White Silence
by drippingawesomeness
Summary: After an unexpected encounter with Kaneki Ken, a silent, mysterious stranger, Touka can't help but come back for more. TouKen Human AU
1. Encounter

White Silence

December.

 _He_ was there.

 _He_ was always there.

…So where was _he_ now?

January.

It was the first time she had seen _him_.

 _He_ sat, lone, at the pavilion in the park.

Only a notebook and pen to keep him company.

 _His_ silk white hair danced in the slow breeze.

 _His_ solemn gray eyes whispered years of desperation.

 _His_ gaze swept over the white roses that encompassed _him_.

To her _he_ seemed like an angel stained gray with the colors of this world.

July 1st.

 _Pit, pat, pit, pat, pit, pat._

The rain curtained the tears that endlessly streamed down her flushed cheeks.

Her heart: shattered. Her trust: broken. Her faith in him: lost.

Her pale blue dress had soaked through completely and her muddled feet led her through the streets in a haphazard manner. She had collided into a multitude of people each either gave her a grimace or had mumbled insincere apologies. She continued her trek, blind to the world around her. At long last she arrived at the park where she took shelter under a pavilion.

The stranger she had seen months ago sat across from her. His gentle eyes gazed upon her with curiosity and concern.

Observing her sodden state he stuck his coat out in offering; she mumbled soft thanks and wrapped the warm coat around her drenched shoulders.

The table they sat at was strewn with papers and the silver-haired young man continued to write as fervently as before she had reached this place. After finishing the page he was working on he let out a satisfied sigh, collected the rest of the pages, and reached for the thermos that sat next to him. He poured a steaming brown liquid from the metal container into a metal cup and slid it calmly over to the woman. She shook her head in refusal and the man frowned in concern. He tore a page off of his notebook and wrote something down and handed it to the female sitting across from him.

 _Are you alright?_ It read and she could no longer suppress the dam threatening to fall from her crystal blue eyes. She burst out in tears and began to sob.

The man across from her flustered, it was obvious he wasn't use to dealing with crying women. He observed her from his spot and contemplated about what to do. He stood from his spot and strode over to sit next to her and gently placed his hand on the woman's back and stroked it gently in hopes of comforting her.

They remained that way for a good half hour before the woman sputtered out her story –with much difficulty- in between sobs: "I-I was out sh-shopping when I s-saw," this next part was evidently difficult for her to choke out because it took a few minutes for her to calm down before she could continue, "m-my boyfriend, h-he w-was with a-another…." She didn't have to finish her sentence to get her message across. Her confession brought a flood of painful memories and she began to cry vehemently but it all soon slowed to quiet sniffling.

She didn't know why she had just spilled her story to a complete stranger but in all honesty it made her feel much better. The man stopped soothing her in order to grab the piece of paper from earlier and wrote _I'm sorry_ in small, concise letters. The woman gave a wan smile, "Well at least now I'm rid of that sick bastard" she chuckled although her heart still winced at his memory. The man gave her a small, reassuring smile and wrote down a few more words.

 _He must be blind for leaving someone as beautiful as you._ It said and she smiled. 'A smile that could put the moon to shame' he thought.

"My name is Kirishima Touka," she introduced herself. _Kaneki Ken_ he wrote. _Nice to meet you Kirishima-san_. "Please, just call me Touka, Kirishima is too long to write anyway" she remarked. The man nodded and wrote, _Then just Ken would be fine with me._ His lips curved up shyly and Touka found it endearing, she was glad her recent episode would at least do her some good by concealing the ever-forming red creeping onto her cheeks.

"Thank you, for today…" she flushes, Touka wasn't used to being consoled, especially not by strangers; she had lived alone for most of her life. "And sorry for bothering you," the blue haired girl apologizes. Ken shakes his head brushing off her apology and writes one last thing before she leaves; _I hope we get to meet again._ "Don't worry, we will," Touka replies confidently, she was definitely not going to let this mysterious embodiment known as Kaneki Ken go that easily.


	2. Cookies

Copyright Disclaimer: All credit goes to the brilliant Ishida Sui for creating such complex and beautiful characters for his fans to create stories with ^.^

And to all my readers and reviewers: Thank you for taking the time out of your day for reading my story, I really appreciate it. I might not have finished this next chapter without everyone's kind words.

July 8th.

The fragrance of golden roses was embracing her. Cobalt sundress flowing behind her in an effort to outrun the flying breeze only to be wrung back forcefully by the seams it had been bound to. A slender hand approaches the wide brim hat that threatens to leap away from her fair head, while the other cradles something tightly against her side. She looks up, a pair of indigo eyes intent, with curiosity.

He could feel his breath escape.

 _She_ was here.

Touka approached the silver haired man in front of her. When he looked up, surprise and recognition spilled out his wide eyes. Touka observed amusedly, "I told you we would meet again didn't I?" The man nodded, still bewildered at the sight of her and studied her as she sat across from him. He didn't expect her to come back.

Touka examined the wooden tabletop, there was neat stack of papers covered with ink, and a laptop that perched beside it, off to the peripheral a pen lay lazily on its side. "So," started Touka albeit awkwardly, "How have you been?" Kaneki gave her a brief, warm smile before grabbing the miniature notebook from his chest pocket and the pen that was brushed off to the side. _It's been an uneventful week._ He wanted to ask her about the man that broke her heart but he didn't want to spoil the shy grin that adorned her face. "I suppose that's a good thing, in a way." Touka set down the book she had been carrying. Its title was _The Centipede_.

Kaneki spotted the object and recognition crossed his eyes and… was there a flicker of amusement? Touka notices his gaze. "Oh! It's a book by Sasaki Haise, do you know him?" she asks. He just laughs. "W-what's so funny?" her face flares crimson.

 _Oh it's nothing_ , _it's just I wasn't expecting such a stylish young, woman like you to be interested in such violent and tragic mysteries._ Touka is taken aback by his answer, it was a compliment, but, was he judging her? "So?" Her eyes became fiery, "Even stylish, young women are interested in horror stories that psychopaths wouldn't dare touch" Touka chastised, features forming an expression of defiance. Her interests were personal and she didn't appreciate others' criticism over it.

But, her reprimands obviously didn't succeed as Kaneki just continued to laugh at her response. He finally fell silent after noticing the piercing glare she threw his way, but even then he tried to cloak his snicker behind long, delicate fingers that let loose the image of his soft pink lips curling up at the sides.

After regaining his composure Kaneki finally asks, _So then_ _what do you like about his writing, Touka-chan?_ She gaped. It was strange; something about his immaculate way of writing her name was _different_. Maybe it was because it was so tidy unlike her careless letters that seemed to run into each other like lost children frantically searching for their parents. He made her name appear _meaningful_ , like it was a hidden treasure amongst an uncharted sea of words.

She only snapped out of her daze when he began to wave his hand in front of her face. Oh, she realized, and then noticed that she had been staring at his words for an extremely inadmissible length of time. Brushing off the embarrassment that threatened to chew her out she gathered her thoughts.

Touka loved Sasaki-san's writing, but she didn't know _what_ she liked about it. "I'm not sure to be honest," she admitted looking up distantly at the pointed canopy, "His writing style is subtle," she breathed, "and the way he expresses emotions is just so _raw_ , you really can't help but _feel_ something." Kaneki took time to digest her words and nodded thoughtfully _. I'll let him know_ , he told her.

"W-w-wait, what?!" she sputters in surprise and stands up to lean across the table; she couldn't believe such an unprecedented development. "Y-you know him?" Touka's mouth hung agape. _He's an old friend_ , he explains. Touka stares, speechless, at Kaneki with childish wonder as though he was a prize won at the lottery. "C-can I meet him? I-If that's okay with you" He shakes his head, _Sorry, he's really shy,_ he apologizes. Touka slumps back down onto the bench and sighs, "It's fine, I suppose his anonymity is a part of his identity" she says "Although, it does makes him quite alluring," She shoots him a mischievous grin and his cheeks warm.

 _I can get you his autograph if you want,_ he offers. "Really?" she beams. He nods and watches, amused, at how her expression turned into that of someone who had just found a treasure chest at the foot of their bed. She ardently repeated her thanks before remembering what she had come for.

"Oh, I almost forgot!" Touka sits back down and grabs the small purse she had brought. She extracts a small plastic container and hands it to Kaneki. He sends her a quizzical expression. "It's for last time, I-I just wanted to say thanks" Touka stutters and her face flushes at the memory. _What is it?_ Kaneki asks curiously as he undoes the clasps and lifts the lid. "C-Cookies," she hoped he wouldn't notice the fact that they were slightly burnt, it was her fifth batch and the few that she had selected for him were the only ones in edible condition. "They're mint," she adds. He opens the box and gives one a cautious look, Touka could feel her heart racing as he grabs one of the emerald circles and takes a small, careful bite. Kaneki's stony expression divulges nothing until he looks up and offers her an affable smile reassuring her that they were fine. Touka lets out a chuckle of relief, maybe her cooking wasn't that bad after all.

He offers her coffee just like last time and she accepts. This time it was iced, perfect for the smoldering heat the sun inflicted upon them. Although the pavilion did provide them a cool shade to rest in it was still pretty hot. Touka murmured small thanks and sipped the drink slowly, savoring its sweet flavor and letting out a satisfied sigh afterwards.

They spent the afternoon in comfortable silence in which Touka read her book and Kaneki typed as fervently as he wrote. When the sun began to set they parted ways, both already anticipating the next time they would meet.


	3. Meteor Shower

Present

They were falling _jewels_ ,

broken and in _pain_ ,

That's why they always had their tails to keep them company;

They weren't tails at all,

just a ceaseless cycle of _tears_.

July-August

At first, Touka and Kaneki met every week, but as days passed they found themselves craving the presence of the other and time pulled them closer, like two opposing sides of a magnet, until they began meeting almost every day.

Touka always came after her summer classes and did most of her school work at the pavilion while Kaneki wrote pages and pages of words only to scratch them out with crude ink strokes which were usually accompanied with more, smaller words on top. One day she questioned him about his work but his answer, _I express my imagination for a_ _living, isn't that great?_ Which had been accompanied by a goofy grin had left her hanging. And if he had extra time left over he always helped her out with her literature homework.

Even though his tutoring skills were quite adept Touka could never concentrate, she always caught herself observing him. The way his lashes curled at the ends like a ski slope or the steep slant of his nose that twitched whenever he was about to sneeze or even the way his eyes crinkled at the end when she finally grasped something she couldn't before. More than once they found their fingers brushing and more than once did a tingle run down her spine. And when it did happen, Touka somehow wounded up in a dizzying mess that was impossible to escape from; she had to rely on a bitter shot of coffee for that.

They always had coffee afterwards to replenish their exhausted brains. It was Touka who always brought coffee in her rabbit themed bottle and mugs. It all started when she had brought some for the occasion, or maybe it was just to show off, and Kaneki had admitted, with surprise, that her coffee was infinitely better than his. To this Touka shrugged, in an attempt to play off her blithe, but failed horribly as a shy grin managed to sneak out, and told him that she had been a barista during her high school days and had become accustomed to whipping up an exquisite cup of Joe for herself every morning. No one had ever appreciated her coffee, and even though it was an insignificant matter, coffee was something dear to Touka, it was the one thing that connected her to the fading memories of her late father and a brother that abandoned her years ago.

* * *

It was a Sunday afternoon and she had been strolling over to the pavilion when Yoriko had pulled over next to her. Touka looked up, clearly bewildered since her best friend should've been at the mall hours ago. Today had been her friend's long anticipated blind date with, Hirako Take, was it? She lifted an eyebrow and Yoriko just sighed disappointedly.

"He was super boring in every way possible!" she scrunched her eyebrows, "and outrageously persistent, it took forever to get out of there!" and flailed her arms in frustration, a scowl pulling down her usually upturned expression.

Touka couldn't help but laugh, she had known Yoriko since middle school and not once did fate take her side when it came to matters dealing with boys. Her friend's unfortunate luck only succeeded to amuse her and she wondered why she didn't just stop trying so hard, it was truly a waste of time and effort.

"Touka-chan, it's not funny!" Yoriko pouted, but her voice slowed to a shy stop when she saw that her friend had no intention of halting her musings. Touka grasped her sides as they had begun to cramp and wiped a tear that had slipped from the corner of her left eye. She gradually quieted after noticing the whispers and glances the people around them had begun to throw at them behind their palms. After regaining her breath she asked, "Yoriko, why do you try so hard?" it was said gently with a soft tone. Yoriko gazed down at the steering wheel, tightened her grip just a tiny bit -and whispered- her voice barely audible in the sea of conversation that consumed them. "It's because I don't want to lose to you, Touka-chan." Touka's eyes widened, it wasn't very loud, but they had known each other long enough to read the words right off of the other's lips. "Y-Yoriko," she was at a loss for words.

After a minute of silence the other spoke up. "Anyways," the amber-haired girl brightened suddenly, "That wasn't why I came to see you," she glanced up at her friend, mischief hid behind her dark, olive eyes. She reached over for the purse that lay next to her and dug out a hued –flyer? "This is for you, go there with _him_ ," she stated. Touka felt a blush creep on to her cheeks and glance upon the brightly colored paper she had received. It was an ad for a new coffee shop that had opened nearby and there was a spread of promotional offers at the bottom. She stood there for a minute to consider –should she go for it? Touka grabbed the bag at her side and swiftly plucked the mug that poked out at the corner and passed it to Yoriko who clutched it gingerly and placed it into a cup holder. "Have fun," she winked.

Touka gently smacked herself with the flyer, feeling her face heat up. What had she done?

She approached him with slow, cautious steps; a soft blush dusted her fair cheeks. Kaneki shot her a curious glance when she sat across from him, an expanse of wood dividing them, _an expanse that would always divide them_ , he thought glumly. He observed the missing thermos that always poked out from the side of her purse and gazed up at her once again. She refused to meet his eyes and appeared to be engrossed with the hem of her skirt. He was puzzled with her uncanny behavior.

Suddenly her head shot up and she blurted, "I forgot the coffee!" silence ensued. Kaneki looked at her first with bewilderment then a wave of relief washed over his features. _That's it?_ He chuckled; _I thought something had happened to you._ He donned on a goofy grin. "I-Idiot, why would something happen to me?" he watched her shoulders release from the tension that had condensed them before. She flashed him a determined expression before thrusting an iridescent paper in front of him. It was an ad for the new coffee shop that he had passed by earlier.

"Do you want to go?" She said, matter-of-factly before looking away. "I-I mean, if you're not b-busy or anything." she began to fidget with the hem of skirt once again. Kaneki threw her an amused look. _Was she asking him out on a date?_ He wondered amusedly. He pretended to ponder on his answer, relishing her squirm under his gaze with her face turning various colors of scarlet, before giving an affirmed nod. She beamed.

"Then let's go," without hesitation she dragged Kaneki by the wrist and he followed, still bemused with these sudden turn of events, but that didn't stop the grin that adorned his face from appearing. Maybe he did have a shot after all.

* * *

"This is the place," said Touka. They stood in front of a two-story building surrounded by various potted plants and trees. She glanced to the side; he was reading the sign that stood in front of them, _Welcome to Anteiku,_ it read. He gave her a reassuring nod indicating that they had indeed arrived at the precise location. She didn't think he would accept her offer; it took what felt like eternity for him to deliver a response. She silently thanked Yoriko for making this all possible.

He tugged at their linked hands and nodded towards the door, as if to say _let's go inside._ She then noticed her still-tight grip on his wrist and abruptly let it go. Turning crimson, Touka apologized frantically. She wanted to crawl into a dark hole when she imagined the fact that she had held on to his hand for that long and with such _force_. She covered her face with her palms, which were both gently pried away by the man standing in front of her. _It's okay_. He wrote with a timid grin. _Let's go inside._ His cheeks were besprinkled with a rosy hue and his reassuring smile lifted her dying spirit. Touka nodded shyly and they both entered the shop.

It was a quaint place, not many customers occupied the round, brown tables. An array of coffee beans and espresso machines were displayed against the left wall and a long L-shaped counter sat in front of it. They made their way to a corner table where the ceiling high windows offered them a good view of the street outside.

Touka decided she could use the caffeine so when the waitress came around -a woman in her late twenties with long, black hair- she ordered a double-espresso with a pinch of sugar while Kaneki, with the scorching temperature in mind, selected an iced espresso. The woman's raised eyebrow had been dutifully ignored when the silver-haired man gave her his order. He must be used to it, thought Touka with distress.

She peered up to find him gazing off into the distance. When she turned her head she was surprised to find a little girl crying and clasping her hands on her knee. Her mother was brushing away the little girls' tears as her father picked her up and cradled the small child within his arms. He pulled his cheeks and made silly expressions which caused shrieks of delight to stem from his daughter. The mother kissed her wound and the child was soon released and put back onto the street. The family continued their stroll, hand in hand, and the cries of laughter ensued.

When she returned her gaze sorrow reflected in Kaneki's dusty eyes. Touka knew that expression; it reminded her of the day her father had left for work… only to never come back. Forlorn and void– her sapphire eyes had sunk into a state of abyss that held nothing, just cold cut venom that threatened to poison anything and anyone that made a move to provoke her.

She parted her lips, hoping her next words would extinguish his lonesome demeanor, only to be interjected by the waitress who had come back with their orders. "Enjoy your coffee," she said placing the two china teacups on their table. Touka took a sip of coffee; it was delicious, but maybe a little too good.

 _It's beautiful isn't it?_ "W-What?" Touka was startled by the sudden reversal of mood. His lips curved up tenderly, but his eyes still held traces of the anguish that had graced it before. He nodded towards the window. Streaks of light bled from the sun like an endless stream of tears that would continue to run for eternity.

His words were faithful.

But it made her want to cry.

* * *

Impenetrable obsidian bathed the city of Tokyo. A piquant aroma of coffee wafted from their clothes and from the building they had recently departed. Crickets murmured amongst themselves in a melodic fashion and a frigid chill that had settled in with the rising moon bit into their skin. The young woman shivered and in response Kaneki handed her a light jacket he had brought with him. "Th-Thanks," she murmured, heat rushing to bedeck her delicate cheeks.

 _Come on I have something I want to show you,_ he expressed. He had been mulling over it for the past week but he didn't know how to bring it up. The work week began on Monday and he knew the activity would have them both running late. He was fearful of her answer so he decided to just whisk her away with him while he still had the chance.

The streets were flooded with people; families hurried their children into nearby restaurants while couples strolled hand in hand towards places that emitted warmth. A young man sang songs of God while strumming a worn guitar. In the masses of people Kaneki noticed his companion having a problematic time keeping up with him and eventually it became so that she completely disappeared from sight.

Retracing his steps he found her surrounded by a group of men -maybe around their early twenties- ogling her figure up and down and drunkenly trying to persuade her to go out with them on a date. Aggravated, he swiftly marched over and effortlessly slid an arm around her slight shoulders. Disgruntled, they scowled, and sauntered over to another woman who stood alone glancing impatiently at the clock on her wrist.

Releasing the embrace Kaneki confronted her cherry red appearance. _Are you okay?_ he questioned. She nodded, her soft curls bobbing with the motion. He held his arm towards only to observe a quizzical expression rippling through her features. In answer he quickly scribbled, _Take my arm so you don't get lost again_. Her brows lifted and her rosy lips molded into an 'oh'. "A-Are you sure?" she stumbled out. He gave her a reassuring nod.

She laced her arm through his bent one and clanged their elbows together. Although it was such a formal gesture it didn't seem odd in the mass of interlocking hands. As he led her towards their destination, Kaneki was acutely aware of the slender arm that cleaved to his left arm. He could feel the heat radiate off her skin and wondered if she could hear the rapid beating of his heart; she was so close she surely could, he thought. They traversed in cumbersome silence; he noticed her dainty lips part twice only for them to reunite once again with a shaky breath.

When they reached Shinjuku station she looked up at him with surprise spilling from the depths of her eyes. "Where are we going?" she asked, a glint of curiosity lit her face. But a _You'll see_ was all she was going to uncover from him.

It approached half past nine when they finally boarded their train. It was mostly unoccupied except for the old man who lay asleep at the far left and a disheveled man rustling through a copious pile of files. They sat, right across the sliding double doors, unnoticed. They didn't utter a word. Instead all Kaneki felt was light thump on his left shoulder as the grip around his arm went limp.

He gently turned his head in order to gaze at her sound expression, her eyes were still but her chest rose rhythmically. He took in every detail, her deep set eyes, the elegant curve of her brow, and her lips…. Kaneki leaned in, he was unsure of what drove him to be so brave, maybe it was the adrenaline or maybe it was her expression, so innocent, so unguarded, unlike the usual protective nature she always hid behind. He was inches away before he sighed and brushed a stray strand of her hair away from the porcelain nose it caressed. A snort resounded in the distance.

It was the bedraggled man from before. He rolled his eyes and resumed scribbling in a corpulent organizer. Kaneki gave him a measured look before sighing disappointedly –yet again– and rest his back on the cushioned seats. He slid his arm and laced his fingers with hers, a perfect fit, he thought, before closing his eyes.

* * *

Touka's eyes fluttered open at the sensation of a warm hand gently nudging her shoulder, trying to disentangle her from the netted confines of sleep. All she saw was white, then a few blue lines, and ink streaks that eventually coalesced to knit words. _We're here_ it read. She evaluated her surroundings, there was no one, the train car was empty. Recalling the events of who-knows-how-long-ago, Touka jolted awake. She looked up to find a beaming white-haired man looking down at her and hurriedly tugging her by the hand. She stood up clumsily; sleep still clung soundly onto her. Although it was all flung away as soon as she read the screen above his head: Last stop Mount Takao.

"Why-what?" was all she managed to sputter before he hauled her through the sliding doors. She breathed in -about to let him hear a piece of her mind about what they were doing on a secluded mountain _alone_ \- when what lay before her stole her breath. They were about half-way up Mount Takao on a guarded overhang. The city lights danced like fireflies in the distance and Tokyo Tower stood amongst the throng of skyscrapers like a King, ruling the others with fine dominance. But that wasn't really what left her speechless.

It was the stars. The stars that twinkled above them. Touka shuffled through her memories; no she could not remember ever gazing at these many stars. They glittered, swarms of them, they all glittered like tiny drops all part of the same ocean. Coming together to create something as marvelous and wondrous as the sky that hung above them. Suddenly, the inky black of the night seemed to dissipated as the dazzling lights that danced above them illuminated the desperate world underneath.

He lifted his right arm and pointed with a single slender finger and told her, _See that one over there, the bright one with a tiny sprinkle next to it, that's Jupiter and one of its many moons._ He wrote more and more until the words spilled of the page. Then he began pointing out various stars and the constellations that they were a part of.

He beamed, his smile for once reached his eyes and bathed them in luster, his lips stretched wide and his features waltzed, leaving Touka to wonder if she would ever be able to witness such a dazzling sight again. Suddenly fearful of a delusion she squeezed their interlacing hands to reassure herself, he was solid, he was here, and he wasn't going _anywhere_.

Then it _began_.

It was sluggish at first, they only came on an occasion and were few in number, but then they _really_ fell. _This is where the show really starts_ he wrote. They were like little lightning bolts, they flashed across the sky in a blink of an eye, she thought. Petite heads followed by long tails sprinted across the starry ocean. There were hundreds, maybe thousands of these fascinating objects flying in front of them.

Some crisscrossed while others ran parallel, others raced against each other while others flew close together only to part quickly as the sky fell short on space. One pair even flew towards each other but the large echoing bang was never heard. They were like children and the sky was there vast playground.

How nice it would be, thought Touka,

to become these ignorant stars.

* * *

Copyright Disclaimer: All credit goes to the brilliant Ishida Sui for creating such complex and beautiful characters for his fans to create stories with ^.^ (Seriously, he works super hard for all of us and we should recognize him for that )

And thanks again to all of my readers for supporting me; I sort of ended up procrastinating on this chapter so forgive me for that. I hope this chapter was able to make up for my absence .


	4. Tsukiyama Shuu

Copyright Disclaimer: All credit goes to the brilliant Ishida Sui for creating such complex and beautiful characters for his fans to create stories with ^.^

To all my readers and reviewers: Thanks again for keeping up with this story. Your responses never cease to surprise me, thanks for making me smile all day :) I hope you enjoy this chapter to the fullest.

* * *

August

She thought of the excruciating force that tore her into a million pieces.

The patience and effort it took to glue them back together.

Only for them to scatter again….

Maybe this time they wouldn't, she thought.

A hollow chuckle resounded.

* * *

A man stood, towering over her form. A red suit accompanied by a violet dress shirt adorned his slender figure. Touka couldn't help but think of how outrageous it was to wear a suit under such a blistering sun. She watched his temperate gaze stroll across the strands of her free-flowing hair, over the soft blue button up, to the edges of her charcoal boots. She noticed his eyebrows draw together quizzically at the disdainful frown she had plastered on, but his cordial smirk never faltered.

"Ah," he began; "You must be Kirishima Touka-san?" a quirked eyebrow vanished behind the lavender bang that swept across the left half of his face. His velvety voice was well matched with the graceful set of his features. "Yes," she murmured, utterly baffled by this man's sudden appearance. She startled even more when he bent down on one knee and gently pressed his lips to the back of her left hand.

"You are even lovelier in person, Kirishima-san," he spoke and held out the carmine rose that adorned his breast pocket and molded his mouth into a devious, although pleasant, grin. She produced no reaction as she accepted the rose -it was truly exquisite- one that Touka had never ever seen before and seemed to be at the peak of its bloom. The stranger kept his polite gaze upon her steady as he rose back on to his two feet. He observed her features knit in contemplation.

He was a gentleman, no doubt, thought Touka, but she couldn't help but feel smothered by this stranger's kindness. It was sickly sweet and her senses rang in warning whenever his expression curtained insidious intent. It reminded her of the time she had gone to the summer festival with Yoriko only to return home nauseous because of a spoiled candy apple. Deciding that this stranger had probably shown up for a reason, especially since he knew who she was, Touka asked him for his name.

When he realized he forgot his introduction he cried with distress, "Oh my, where are my manners?" resting his palm over his heart he introduced himself with a slight bow, "I am Tsukiyama Shuu, Kaneki-san's age- err- his friend." The tense smile he revised did not go unnoticed but Touka's interest was taken with the mention of the the silver haired man. She came to the pavilion for one of their many meet ups but she wasn't expecting to find such an eccentrically dressed man. She supposed this visitor was present in place of him.

"Do you have some business with me?" Touka attempted to sound courteous but it resounded fraudulently within her head. "Yes, Kaneki-san wished for me to pass this on to you," the man named Tsukiyama passed her a plain, white envelope. On the front was written, _To: Touka-chan_ , in neat, concise letters that could belong to only to Kaneki.

Curious, she opened it up to find a slip of paper along with fellow other, lengthier ones. She read the small slip first:

 _Sorry Touka-chan,_

 _I'll be traveling out of the city for the next week so you don't have to come to the Pavillion since I won't be there. An emergency came up quite suddenly or I would've told you beforehand, that's why I sent someone instead of me. I know Tsukiyama-san's a bit whimsical but I promise he isn't a bad person, especially if you get to know him better. I've attached a few notes for the literature exam you're studying for, so go over them when you can. I'll miss your coffee, Touka-chan._

 _-Kaneki_

Eyes widening she pulled one of the numerous pages that resided within the envelope. Ink and neon yellow with splashes of pink sprinkled the piece of paper, what a lifesaver, she thought. Touka felt her smile stretch from shore to shore when she realized all the effort he put to create the study guide in front of her. It was just like him really, she thought, he always seemed to do little things like this, always managing to earn from her an enchanting smile. She read it in awe, noting his ability to sum up everything in short, simple sentences; she learned more from him than any of her languid teachers combined.

Tuskiyama cleared his throat in order to regain her attention. "Madame Moiselle, if it isn't out of your way I'd like to speak with you," he gestured towards the bench behind him. Unlike before his voice had hardened and the thoughtful grin had dissipated. Touka observed his scrunched eyebrows and solid mauve eyes before nodding. Curiosity rose within her, what could make such a flamboyant man so serious?

As soon as she sat Tsukiyama began, "Kirishima-san, I need you to promise me something." Silence hung between them like a boulder, the gravity of his voice echoed loudly within her head. "What kind of promise?" she inquired, eyes narrowed. He looked down at his adjoined fingertips before moving on. "You must _never_ betray Kaneki-san." His words hit the table with a heavy _thunk_.

Touka looked puzzled, what in the world could this man mean? Tsukiyama rushed to explain after noticing the skeptical mien she held. "Kaneki-san doesn't really have good experiences when it comes to women, although it's not his fault." The smug look she was expecting never arrived, instead, the florid man's eyes dulled somberly. "His mother died at a young age and his aunt was hardly a proper guardian" his voice remarked sarcastically at the latter.

Touka remembered her own parent, "What about his father?" she questioned bleakly, although she already knew what he was going to say. With eyes half-lidded Tsukiyama spoke softly, "He passed away when Kaneki-san was still a child." Just like her mother, she thought.

Maybe she shouldn't have asked but it was something that sizzled at the back of her mind, like BBQ and its aroma labored to fill the fleeting gaps of information she struggled to patch together. "Is that why he-" she spoke in a whisper, a contrast to the firm, audible "No" he suddenly interjected her with.

The brief silence that followed them was hungrily slurped in preparation of the grave realization that streamed from Tsukiyama; with a deep breath he began, "He escaped his Aunt's grasp after spending years within her evil clutches, but he was involved in a… accident" an opaque cloud swooped over his periwinkle eyes, masking all emotions, "That snatched his voice away from him." Touka's breathe abandoned her through the slight gap that had formed between her lips. Her expressions translated the union of truth and realization that formed within her but also the questions that sprung through the crevices that he had left agape.

She looked at the letter that rested on the table, Kaneki's kind words echoed within her head. She found it hard to believe that someone so kind have such a tragic past as the one Tsukiyama had described. Touka couldn't believe he held no evident trace of enmity towards a world as cruel as the one they lived in, was he immune? How could he be so pure despite the bitter stains that trailed his past? His life was one that paralleled hers, so why was he a star that twinkled among others? And why was she just a blade of grass that longingly watched the stars and the sun make their journey across sky? Despite their similarities they were worlds apart, she thought.

A sharp pain broke her out of her trance. She glanced at her lap where her white knuckles rested along with her two bunched fists. She opened her right palm, which held the rose, to discover that an unclipped thorn had bit into her skin; blood trickled from the pad of her index finger. Touka watched the blood slowly trail down, caressing the delicate petal that stood on top of its olive stem.

She heard a rustle opposite her and glanced towards Tsukiyama with a vacant expression, he stood up and straightened his tie. The breeze muffled the man's goodbye and her numb one in return. She sat there until the sun began its plummet into the depths of the earth. She sat there, contemplating all her beliefs and what had become of them.

She thought of how _he_ was so similar to her.

She thought of the pain she had felt all her life.

She thought of how she was always alone.

She thought of how she was always kept in the dark when it came to affection.

She thought she would never find anyone who could truly understand her.

She thought of the day they went to Anteiku,

And his glassy eyes at the sight,

And understood.

And smiled.


	5. Trouble

August

 _Pit, pat, pit, pat,_

She let it all wash away.

* * *

Touka navigated through the usual twists and turns she had become accustomed to over the past month and half. She was quick on her feet with a beam that hung wide. The long awaited week was finally over. Not only was she going to be able to finally see the silver-haired man again she was also done with her exams! Oh how much those notes had held her hand through those dark, dark times. She had texted him a message of gratitude but vowed to thank him properly when they soon meet.

Her hand met the lip of her mahogany cross-body, 'I hope it tastes okay,' she thought. Although she had tried them herself and made sure, she still had a feather of doubt that tickled the back of her mind. 'But,' she began, 'he'll say it tastes delicious even if it doesn't.' Touka chuckled at the memory of the cookies she had last made; despite his delight she had caught the slight tint of green that had kissed his cheeks.

She continued to bask in her bliss but was yanked out of it when a gruff voice could be heard, barking her name in the distance. The blue-haired girl's feet came to a sudden halt and she could feel hot lava rush through her entity. She turned around, fire raged behind the cool waters of her single visible eye as she glared daggers at the man before her. Messy brown hair and familiar dark ochre glasses came into view.

"Nishiki," his name left a bitter taste upon her tongue. Touka narrowed her eyes; she hoped her sharp tone would chase him away and keep him from spoiling her already soiled mood. "Touka," he repeated before he breathed in and blurted, "I'm sorry for last time, I don't know what I was think-" Nishiki didn't get to finish before Touka interrupted him, "I don't want to hear your shitty lies, Nishiki, if you really were sorry you would've come earlier" she yelled, she could feel hot, salty water prick her eyelids.

Touka glanced away, her expression leaked the pent up melancholy that had churned within her the past weeks. The man's downcast glance spoke of nothing but guilt, and despite his angle he was able to catch the faint glimmer that rolled down the woman's cheek which was quickly wiped away. His eyes widened, he had never once seen her cry. Regardless their relationship his ex-girlfriend had stubbornly refused to let her walls down in front of him no matter how much he tried to break them, not even a scratch was made in her defense, and as hard as it was to admit, it was true for him too.

Nishiki took a deep breath and gathered his words; he hoped he could patch up the holes between them, "I cheated because you didn't open up to me." Touka looked up with surprise, his gaze reminded her of steel, still and unfaltering. But when the words he spoke finally registered, she could feel the lulled flame ignite. "And she did?" she heard herself chuckle, a low, empty chuckle. "Do you know how stupid you sound right now Nishiki?" She appeared amused, a sick twisted humor that shadowed the pain she felt. Touka felt it bubble beneath her skin, it intensified with each passing second, she wondered if it was obvious, if others could see the anger eat away any self-control that she could muster.

"I don't care how stupid I sound, Touka, I'm tired of dealing with your shit," he scowled before smoothing his expression, Kimi's words echoed within his head, 'You have to apologize to her Nishiki, and don't bother coming back here until your forgiven.' "I'm her to apologize to you, I'm sorry for hurting you, Touka." _Crack_ and that was it. She sprinted, her fist balled and knuckles white, ready to collide with the man's cheek.

Inches, inches, she was _inches_ away from the stunned cinnamon eyes that gaped at her beyond the slender hand that blocked her fist. A snarl graced her face for a moment and vanished as she locked eyes with the man in front of her. The fury that had spiraled out of control immediately quelled at the sight of him. "K-Kaneki," she spoke still bewildered.

His gaze gave nothing; his firm eyes held her in place as he grabbed her and tugged her away from the clearing. Touka ceded and let the slight man whisk her towards the Pavilion. She was too dumbfounded by the temperate strength that had blocked her wrist to resist him. No one she had encountered through the years had accomplished to block her at full force, especially someone as frail as Kaneki, or so she thought. But what really left her stupefied was the skin on Nishiki's face; it was as pale as parchment.

* * *

He didn't let go of her hand until they reached the foot of the pavilion. His grip was firm, unlike the gentle touch he used when they went to watch the meteor shower. When he turned around to face her, his eyes held disappointment. Touka's eyebrows pulled in confusion trying to figure out what might have made him upset.

Kaneki swiftly slid his notepad out of his pocket. _You should forgive him,_ he wrote. She gaped at the words written before her before lashing out in frustration, "What do you care?" A ghost of a smile graced his face at her question; _You're my precious friend Touka-chan_. She shifted her focus onto the bench that sat a few feet away. It took all her will not to stomp on the ground and cry out a string of extremities. "Never, I'd rather beat him to a pulp," she hissed, gritting her teeth.

 _Touka, you can't hold a grudge forever, it'll just burden you and eat you from the inside out._ It was the first time he had used her name without the honorific. She gazed into his smoky eyes; they failed to falter and held age old wisdom. She wondered what he had gone through to gain it. Despite his earnestness she refused to give in, "I don't care, Kaneki," she retorted.

The gravity in his expression dissolved to rage as a flicker of hurt crossed his face. _Well you should,_ he remarked. As their quarrel intensified, Kaneki's words transformed from neat and controlled into something harsh and barely legible. The pen flew over the paper, which could barely keep up with the rough procedure its owner bestowed upon it.

Eventually, feeling fed-up and humiliated Touka fled, but not without leaving a rancorous chain of words behind. She sprinted blindly through the thicket of trees even though the act left angry red streaks to form on her exposed arms. The main street came into view and she let her wrath steer her through the maze buzzing with people.

Sometime along the way stormy clouds had begun their act of befalling fat blobs of water upon the bustling streets of Tokyo. Many reached for their umbrellas while others scrambled for shelter. Touka continued her trek, disheveled and soaking wet, she wandered aimlessly for what seemed like hours. When she looked up she was alone. The scan of her surroundings told her to run; she seemed to have found herself in the more dubious parts of the city.

She spun around and hiked the opposite direction, her heart raced and feet throbbed. Early night claimed the sky since the dense clouds refused to let any remaining light from the sun shine through. Touka cursed herself for being stupid enough to wander forsaken places. There was always a good reason why people didn't occupy certain locations.

The lone lamp post at the corner flickered, once, twice, and thrice before it died. Its absence gave birth to the sickening obscurity that surrounded the blue eyed woman. She could see absolutely nothing except for black. She could only feel the numb prickling, onslaught of water on her drenched skin. She smelled the scent of rain. She could taste the tart acid of peril and what it provoked within her. And she heard something, faint and far off into the distance.

 _Pat, pat, pat._ Footsteps.

Her senses sharpened and she darted, splashing puddles on the way. The rhythmic drum grew near, _shit_ , she thought. Touka was in no condition to fight; her thoughts were muddled and her limbs moved sluggishly. She felt a grimy hand cover her mouth and she flung her elbow towards the man's face. The collision caught him off guard and knocked him to the ground, but much to Touka's dismay his companion came from behind and firmly clutched both of her wrists to her back. She swung her body and kicked his side, it caught him off balance and his grip on her slackened and she wrung free.

She scurried away from the men behind her and despite the beating she had given they didn't cease the chase. Touka took a turn to lose them but they navigated towards her with ease and after a few more lefts and rights she found herself backed up against an alley. The attackers caught up to her and she knew it was over. They had summoned reinforcements and she could count seven of them.

Her eyes slid shut; she took in a shaky breath and released it slowly, bracing herself. With her right foot positioned slightly forward and her fist up in the air. Her eyes snapped open and she lunged towards them.

* * *

 **Tried a cliffhanger for the first time so tell me what you think of it .**

 **And thx again for taking the time to read my story, it's a slow burn isn't it?**

 **Copyright Disclaimer: All credit goes to the brilliant Ishida Sui for creating such complex and beautiful characters for his fans to create stories with ^.^**

 **P.S. xxxDreamingflowerxxx I've been thinking about your comment for a while now and I think it's about time we start making happier stories XD**

 **Poor Kaneki, we all end up making him suffer so much** T.T


	6. Blood

**I'm so sorry guys this chapter took forever .**

 **I'd love some feedback and constructive criticism since this is the first time I've written scenes like this, and I know I don't really show it but I love it when you all review, it leaves me smiling all day long :)**

 **Copyright Disclaimer: All credit goes to the brilliant Ishida Sui for creating such complex and beautiful characters for his fans to create stories with ^.^**

* * *

Touka's fist collided with a jaw and found her foot infiltrating deep within someone's gut. Her elbow came in contact with a pointed nose while her knee aimed for another's crotch. A sickening crunch was heard at the former. Everything appeared surreal, her attacks, the faint gleam of the moon the parting clouds released, and the grunts and groans that echoed through out the empty alley. Her senses were clear cut and every motion seemed flawlessly executed, her guard felt impenetrable. A smile graced her lips, how long had it been since she had last gotten into a fight? But it was soon broken at the nagging thought she wouldn't last long against this many, especially since she had only taken them by surprise.

Her suspicion was confirmed when they regained their composure and attempted to immobilize her limbs, but her lithe figure made it easy for Touka to slip out of their clumsy hands. She spotted an opening and dashed towards it only to be yanked roughly by the collar and flung onto the opposite wall. Her bones shivered on impact and her breath was forced out of her body. The jolt caused her head to swim and her senses to mingle.

"Grab the rope, our orders were to capture her alive," an authoritative voice spoke. What? She glanced up at the man, her arched eyebrows and wide eyes well communicated her shock. Touka felt as though a cool hand had seized her frantic heart; she was warm then freezing cold, freezing cold then warm. Her shallow, uneven breaths echoed loudly in the distance. The world tilted as her clammy fingers struggled to grasp the situation. The man strode towards her and the moonlight caught the hazel stubble that adorned his chin.

He was inches away from her when a _crack,_ followed by a cry, resounded from the front. Touka's attacker whipped around and she felt relief clear some of the fog that had overrun her comprehension; she took this distraction as an opportunity to kick his legs out from underneath him. There was a loud _thud_ as his sturdy form dropped onto the concrete. She struggled to make out the murky form of the intruder, or should she say her savior, in the midst of the mass of bodies that surrounded her.

She heard muffled shouts and various gasps of disbelief. "I-It's the o-one-eyed king," "But that's impossible… h-he's _dead,_ " and then, "Stop saying shit guys he's probably just… an imposer." The last statement came out broken but persuaded the men to pull out their pocket knives and a metal beam that sat on the side was grabbed with haste. The uncertainty from earlier had not completely dissipated. Touka could sense the fear gripe their hearts with icy claws.

They lunged after him only to fall like a chain of doomed dominoes, one after the other, each fall somehow leading to another. The moon shone brightly, its light accentuated the beauty of the infiltrator as he gracefully dodged the multitude of metal that hurled his way. His face was hidden behind a leather mask paired with an eye patch and lipless teeth, it exuded menace. A stormy eye peaked up at her and she noticed the way his bloodied hair danced with the breeze.

Bodies were strewn on the ground like confetti and blood smeared over the walls like sprinkles. The metal beam from earlier lay abandoned to the side, it was easily kicked out of the man's grasp, Touka remembered. Despite all the blood shed everyone seemed okay, injured, but okay. The masked man sashayed towards the sole pair leftover.

The hazel haired man found himself gawking up at the silver-haired man that now stood before him. "Ka-" it was a lone syllable that left his quivering lips but it drove chills down Touka's spine. He said no more when the trespasser lifted a finger to his lip-less mouth and shook his head haltingly, eyes steadfast. Realization crossed the tall man and he sprawled out the alleyway.

* * *

Kaneki slipped his mask down so it rested like a scarf upon his neck. It seemed, to Touka, that the mask represented a side of him that she had accidentally stumbled upon. She gaped up at him, mouth parted, a fleeting expression of fear graced her face for moment before molding into one of astonishment. His eyes regarded her warmly, a contrast to the chill they had invoked just moments before, but they soon glanced away and she saw a flicker of anguish cross them.

Hesitantly, he held a hand out for her. Touka observed his long, familiar fingers; she had come to ingrain the lines that curved across his palms and the way they crinkled whenever he wrote into her memory. It reminded her of home, a home she had created with him in the past few months, a home where she could belong like the one she lost so long ago.

Her memories of her brother, Ayato, and her late father, who Kaneki resembled so much, all came flooding to the surface. Her break-up with Nishiki and the day she had caught him, their fight that afternoon and the argument she had with Kaneki, they all rushed to fill her up. And she understood that no matter what happened Kaneki would be there for her, during the worst of times and during the best of times; during her ugliest and most beautiful moments, and she vowed to be there for him too.

Touka heard a sharp intake of breath when she pressed up against his damp polo with her arms wrapped around his shoulders. Her head buried deep into the soft crook of his neck, the scent of rain and soap wafted into her nose. She could perceive the rapid hammering of his heart against her own. His arms gradually came to rest gently on her waist, like he was afraid the blue-haired woman would disappear any moment.

Touka further tightened her frail arms around him and relished the warmth he radiated. "It's okay," she whispered. She felt him trace letters on her back, _Yeah,_ he wrote, and then tightened his grip. "Thank you," she sighed, "For saving me," and looked up into his dusty, gray eyes, they held so much sorrow and a myriad of unresolved mysteries.

An ivory strand fell into his left pupil, blocking it from Touka's view. Irked by the interruption she promptly tucked it behind his ear. Only when his eyes widened, did she realize the close proximity they shared, she could feel his shaky exhale graze her lips.

Her heart hammered and fire ignited within the pit of her stomach, she could feel heat rush to her cheeks, and her legs turn to jelly. She could feel cloth bunch in her fist as she hung on to him, afraid her legs would give at any moment. Her vision trailed down the bridge of his angled nose, lagged at the dip of his cupid's bow, and finally came to rest upon his coral lips. As if reading her inner most thoughts, Kaneki's fingers gently caressed her cheek and tilted her face towards him, and with eyes closing shut they let their lips coalesce.

It started off as a saccharine kiss that lasted mere seconds before it was broken, but its separation enticed their craving for close contact. Their gradual kisses soon grew hungry and passionate as their desire increased; each found themselves in a world of pure bliss, the fractured world around them forgotten.

Lost in an ocean of sensation, Touka felt time slow, the way his silky hair slid between her fingers, the sweet taste of coffee that lingered upon his lips, and the euphoria that bubbled within her chest, each and every touch appeared magnified. She indulged in the ecstasy that was him, she felt the arm around her waist support her limp figure while the other cradled her neck and pressed them closer, if it was possible.

Her arms shamelessly roamed his back in an attempt to memorize each curve she discovered and every inch of the lean muscle that rippled beneath her fingers. She felt something sticky coat her hand and she felt Kaneki wince against her lips. Touka pushed the man away from her and studied the scarlet liquid with much horror.

"Kaneki, you're bleeding," she gasped.


	7. Sorry :(

Dear Readers,

I just wanted to say I'll be discontinuing this story for a while. I may or may not finish it in the future (who knows?) if I can. I'm sorry if you were really looking forward to what was going to happen I'm thinking of making one last chapter as a synopsis, but idk if I should upload it.

I'm grateful for all your support so far, it has been really encouraging. Truthfully this was my first fanfic ever, like ever, and I was terrified of what it would be like. But in the end it wasn't so bad, no truthfully it was really awesome :) And all of you have been with me for all this time, even if it was for a short month, thank you. Through the thick and thin thank you for bearing any mess ups I've had and any blunders I might have made. Forgive me for any broken hearts.

~drippingawesomeness


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